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Why I fired my secretary
09-09-2005, 03:14 PM
Post: #1
Why I fired my secretary

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up that
morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be
pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a present for me.
As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy
Birthday."
I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids will
remember.My kids came in to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I
left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent. As I
walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, "Good Morning Boss, Happy
Birthday!" It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.
I worked until one o'clock and then Jane knocked on my door and said,
"You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your
birthday,let's go out to lunch, just you and me." I said, "Thanks Jane,
that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go!"

We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. We dined
instead at a little place with a private table. We had two martinis each
and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Jane
said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day...We don't need to go back to
the office, do we?" I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in
mind?" She said, "Let's go to my apartment."
After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said,"Boss,if you
don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for a moment. I'll be
right back." "Ok." I nervously replied.
She went into the bedroom and after a couple of minutes, she came out
carrying a huge birthday cake ... Followed by my wife, kids, and dozens
of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday".
And I just sat there...
On the couch...
Naked.

"You can put lipstick on a pig...but it's still a pig!!!"
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09-09-2005, 05:51 PM
Post: #2
Why I fired my secretary
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Hope you continue the story line there!

:boxing: Angel small steps lead to great things
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09-09-2005, 06:22 PM
Post: #3
Why I fired my secretary
Groucho Wrote:And I just sat there...
On the couch...
Naked.

Now that would be funny. :wink_kiss
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09-09-2005, 08:04 PM
Post: #4
Why I fired my secretary
OH LOL - I was thinking - ahhh bless him, and I am goning to send this to my boss for a laugh - then I reached the end and thought - nope this is a lesson in one fell swoop of how to get yourself sacked!!! [I don't know him well enough - and it is his 40th next month!!]:laugh:

I always cook with wine, and sometimes I actually put it in the food.
[Image: pot002.gif]


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14-09-2005, 02:09 PM
Post: #5
Why I fired my secretary
tonee Wrote::laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Hope you continue the story line there!

....so my wife divorced me. She took all my money, I lost my job, my dog ran away. I decided to spend all my time on my life passion, golf. Then I got hit by lightning, and I died.
I woke up in a beautiful golf club house, with the Devil there telling me I had gone to hell for my deeds.
He started to explain the surroundings.
"This is not heaven I'm afraid, but here you have every golf course ever designed. You can also design your own, there is no limit. All are instantly accessible, you always have priority for your tee off times, you can play against any person you want, you can choose Bob Hope for example, or anyone else you ever dreamed of playing. We have a complete selection of clubs ever made for your personal use. Each time you use a set, we provide new ones so that you always have the best. Clothing, we have every designer brand too, always new of course - just pick what you want. The weather? Always perfect, but you can change the temperature, add rain if you want, do what ever makes the golf the most challenging"
I couldn't believe it! This was Hell!!!
I asked if I could play immediately, and he said "Of course you can, any time you choose".
So I said ok, just a pack of Titleist Pro balls and I'm off.......
"Oh sorry", he said "No balls........

.....thats the hell of it"
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