Well have you ever done it or had it done to you?

I have! Today I went to personnel with a list of my boss's unreasonable behaviour which I'd spoken to his line manager about and he'd agreed with me.

I feel a lot better for it, although I have told personnel that at this stage I don't want the information used, as his line manager is going to speak to him on Friday about his unreasonable behaviour. So if things don't improve then I will take things further .... a step I feel will be bound to happen as he is a very ignorant man who would not accept he has faults.

Throughout the company people have tales of this bloke's unreasonable behaviour. EVERYONE is aware of it. And yet when I went to personnel I was flabbergasted to find that NO-ONE had complained!!! It honestly defies belief. The personnel manager said she'd heard rumours and recognised that he could be unreasonable but had no statements from anyone. I'm just so incredulous that I'm using long words like incredulous!

I now feel strongly that if colleagues have a complaint that is valid then they should go to personnel so that the company is aware of the unappropriate, unreasonable behaviour, also to give the "offender" a chance to redeem himself!

So what does anyone else think?

I haven't personally ever had to complain, but I deal with it all the time!

What a shame you've had to put up with this - but hopefully something will be done about it now. Sometimes it's a blessed relief when someone does complain!

PS Happy to help if you need any advice...:)

So Fee for All you should be in professionals/expert declaring your speciality!

I wouldn't bother complaining where I work, our personnel are a total waste of space!

The HR person where I worked (before I left to have my baby last year) was absolutely awful! A complete moody cow. My colleagues complained to the directors & there was a huuuuuge blow up, luckily I wasn't involved- though it was interesting to watch. Meetings upon meetings in the conference room. I felt like a bit of a coward as I had some issues with her, but I was months away from leaving so I didn't see the point. It takes somebody with a strong character to do it. Now she has her own office apart from those who complained (they used to share an office). It looks like it was worth doing it. If somebody is going to cause trouble and peeve people off then they have to get whats coming to them. Its only when they have their heads firmly up the directors anal passage that it may backfire.

It is difficult but I salute you for doing it. Life's too short to allow somebody to behave in a way that is affecting you negatively. It is only work but work is your life for most of the day so its worth making it as best as it can be.

Hope he gets fired !

I have made a serious complaint about a work colleague and like you Dolores no-one else had complained yet the unreasonable and unprofessional behaviour was well known. As I was vocal and clear I experienced quite a backlash with some, total avoidance from others. I stood my ground and, 2 years later, it is still in process. So my word of warning is, watch your step, document everything and don't expect others to support you if it is sink or swim. Mortgages, job security, personal power, self-esteem, fear etc all are players in the office politics. Well done though and good luck. Hope the line manager makes the difference for you.

I am having such problems with a work colleague at the moment, but complaining about them has only made things worse for me. The company I work for is quite small and the MD likes to have complete control over everything.We call our line manager "The pencil allocator" as that is as much authority he has without going through the MD.

Anyway there is this nasty bullying bitch who had worked there for about 20 years. She really is awful, she will attack anyone who doesn't fall into her way off doing things. She is basically good at her job but no where near as perfect and efficient as she makes out. It took me two days to suss her out and realise that she is a bullying manipulating person. I also realised very quickly that no one really likes her, but as one woman pointed out to me, she is better off being your friend than your enemy. Another warned me don't cross her or she'll stab you in the back.
Well I did cross her, and I did get stabbed, big time. I can't stand to see her putting someone down just becausethey are a bit clumsy or forgetful. She resents any of the recent recruits who have degrees, as she worked her way up from the bottom and says you don't need a degree to do our job.
My problem is that the MD is so weak and feeble that even he won't stand up to her! He's happy to let her carry on (even though he knows what she is like) everyone says the reason is that she is too good a worker. Well bullsocks. She's ok, but not irreplaceable. Everyone who works there has an opinion on everyone, and it's always the same opinion, no one has an original thought. I feel like I've gone back in time.
Dolores you are right to complain. I understand why you feel so frustrated that no one else has. People are scared for their jobs and maybe fear that their lives at work will be miserable.
Does this person know how you feel about them?
I think it's always best to try let them know too how you feel.
I don't even talk to this woman at my work now unless it is work related, sometime it's a bit embarrassing and I wish we'd had a row to air our grievences. I did try by asking if it was her who had reported me for something but she denied it, but I knew (and everyone else knew) that it was her, so I kind of hit a brick wall there. I often wonder what I would say to her if she tried to be friendly, in the past I have just got back into chatting to her and not realised that she was still plotting and scheming. I won't go into details about what she did, but it was realy dispicable. I can't understand why somone would want to hurt another person so much. I'm a bit of a softy and I don't like to hurt people's feelings, but what I want to tell her that she disgusts me and unless she apologises to me for her actions then I want nothing to do with her except on a professional level. If I openly voice my opinion I know I'll be seen as a trouble maker.
I hope I've won the loto tonight!

I have spoken to my boss and he knows what my grievances are, but he doesn't see that there is a problem. I'm not backward in coming forward and when I've got a point to make I do make it in a forceful and professional manner, so there's no shilly shallying or much room for misinterpretation. Unfortunately if someone doesn't what to be agreeable and reasonable and no-one has pointed out to them in a proper and professional way that theY need to be, then usually that person carries on being a b*****d!!

We need to unite brothers ...and sisters and just remember "DON'T LET THE *******S GRIND YOU DOWN"!!!


I hope I've won the loto tonight!
Amen to that Bob! ....actually for me this is an impossible dream cos I don't do the lottery! d'oh! :oops:

Bob and Dolores you might want to look up www.abc.ie as a resource. I think that it can be total misery to work with people you cant trust and dont feel safe with. It takes so much energy out of you to maintain your professional and, often distant, because it is necessary, self. Hope you both have better work days from now on.

I wouldn't bother complaining where I work, our personnel are a total waste of space! Same here ILS. I work for an NHS Trust and to be honest, as long as you dont go and punch the chief executive, more or less anything goes, for the simple reason, if you put in a complaint, our HR Dept have no idea how to deal with it or would prefer to sweep things under the carpet.
A male colleague of mine was being bullied at work by his female boss and his health started to suffer. He was hauled over the coals for having too much time off work, and so - with the support of his GP, he decided to go in and tell them exactly why he was getting panic attacks and was avoiding going in. Their answer was to tell him that no-one else had ever complained about her, that they had only ever heard good things about the way she treated staff and to tell him that he needed to see the Doc at Occupational Health and if he were to agree to his GPs request that he take time off work, would, after three months be expected to either attend an interview after three months or have his line manager (the bullying one), visit him at home with a member of HR to have "a little chat" about when he would be returning to work.
He felt demoralised, humiliated, embarrassed and totally unsupported and nothing was done to investigate any of his claims.

He eventually left. He was a very popular guy, especially with his mental health clients, who miss him terribly. What is worse, since he has left, one or two members of staff have come forward to say they witnessed the bullying but are too scared to say anything.

Not honestly sure why we even have an HR Dept ...........

I've never compained to HR about anyone, but I did have a word with my boss about a colleague just before Christmas.

A colleague does the same job as me, except that I deal with over 75% of the workload and she does very little. She some time off last year (maternity)and I thought it was just that maybe she was having trouble settling in again so I left it and left it until I realised that when bonus time came around that we would be judged on the work we have done between us - which isn't fair as I've done most of the work.
It got the the point in November when I was doing over 80% of our work, so I mentioned to my boss that I thought maybe she was struggling a bit to settle back in and if needed I could go through the work with her.He was going to have a word with her.
As it stands now I'm still doing over 75% of the work, but she still hasn't got any better. I did get£500 in recognition of the extra work I'd been doing.
The problem is she's a really nice woman, I really don't know how to handle it from here - but I'll be really miffed if she gets the same bonus as me this year! (our bonuses are based on our performance over the year)

I worked in a great office, it was like a family we all had our ups and down but were totally honest with each other and there was a real fondness between us all. I loved it. Then after I had been there about 5 years we got a new Financial controller [I work in accounts].

He was a complete nightmare, he had never managed before, was childish in the extreme, a bully and spiteful. He would bad mouth people very loudly in our room, I bit my lip for weeks but finally I had had enough of him slagging off friends of mine so I asked if he could not come into our room to do his bitching. From that day on he made it his mission to make my life hell. He would ask all the others what their most hated jobs were and then gave them all to me. He would stand at the door and stare at me, very offputting and threatening. He would follow me if I left the floor and pace up and down outside wherever I went.

I didn't do anything for a couple of years, I wasn't the only one, he offended more and more people and those he had bad mouthed, including the HR manager, got to hear what he had said about them [not from me I hasten to add]. Eventually I went to see the HR manager, in tears, as he had come into the office shouted at me for no reason at all, he had had a dressing down from one of the managers and slammed the door in my face. He paced outside the door [glass] while I was in there, the HR manager eventually started to count how many times he went by in disbelief! She admitted he had no social skills, was a crap manager and a bully but no one had complained. So I did. My collegue also complained as he had been bullying her as well. Within the year both of us were made redundant, on the same day.

We contacted a Union who represented us but the office claimed it was nothing personal it was our roles that were no longer needed. I keep in contact with my old pals there and a few months later sure enough they took on two new people doing the exact same jobs we were! It doesn't always pay to complain.

Still in the long run it was good, I now have a fab job with great people and still see my old friends regularly, best of all I don't have to see that d#ckhead any more :)

that story sounds horrible Christine. ... and defies reason and belief. So unfair.

Glad you found something better and it worked out ok, but it's still darned annyoing that that bloke has got away with it.

and a few months later sure enough they took on two new people doing the exact same jobs we were! It doesn't always pay to complain.

I really feel for you, and its such a shame you lost the job you loved .... but this is illegal. If you are made redundant its because the job isnt there anymore. You cant then take on new people to fill those roles. I think you have to wait a year or more before someone can stand in your old shoes.

I really feel for you, and its such a shame you lost the job you loved .... but this is illegal. If you are made redundant its because the job isnt there anymore. You cant then take on new people to fill those roles. I think you have to wait a year or more before someone can stand in your old shoes.

well that's the theory anyway isn't it! how often do you know of this happening and the company giving a perfectly valid reason for it? lots and lots of times that I know of personally.

well that's the theory anyway isn't it! how often do you know of this happening and the company giving a perfectly valid reason for it? lots and lots of times that I know of personally.
Oh, i know it goes on all the time .... but it is illegal, so if Christine was thinking of suing the company (which she obviously was) this would of been a ruddy large nail in their coffin.

oh dear, this is shocking to hear of how badly some people have been treated!! and in this day and age with things like unions, HR departments, you would expect less of such behaviour to happen! obviously what they teach us at uni doesnt always happen in real life!

I've complained.....my immediate work colleagues have complained in fact everyone who works in the room I work has complained at some point about certain persons and guess what........

Instead of the people causing the problems being sorted other more worthwhile people have decided to give up on the spinless management and wimp infested HR department and leave themselves as it's easier....

Basically complaining to management and HR in my place of work is summed up by this smilie 101% :wallbash:

I should commiserate, but sadly it is this sort of behaviour by so-called managers that keeps me in funds:huh:

Kookykat hit the nail on the head though - there are too many people teaching business studies without the benefit of ever having worked in the real world. Theory rarely manages to address issues, but is very convenient to hide behind.

Thanks Dolores and Bonsai, it was horrible at the time and caused a lot of personal heartache.

My collegue and I did try to sue for unfair dismissal as we had both done our jobs to an acceptable degree for many years. However they had us on this 'role' being made redundant not the person - although it boiled down to the same thing. Also they gave our jobs/roles new names when they employed the new staff even though their tasks were the same, so they claimed they were not replacing like with like. My collegue and I gave up in the end, we decided to move on and let it go for our own sanity.

I don't think I would do things the same now, I would probably keep my mouth shut, which is awful as it means you are not being yourself.

I have to say I have resolved my conflict with my manager. We had an excellent discussion at my personal review recently. Which started off very tense and confrontational and ended up with good feeling alround and me leaving the room feeling that I'd left nothing unsaid.

The status quo is back to what it was pre-December 04, which whilst not always perfectly harmonious is what I was happy with.

I'm a great believer in talking things through and saying what you think, which I know isn't always as easy as it sounds!

I have to say I have resolved my conflict with my manager.


Great news Dol - well done :D

glad you have sorted things out Dol :wink2: its pants when things are uncomfortable at work isnt it.....

Oh well done Dol - glad you got it resolved:)

I had cause to complain about one of my work colleagues this week.

I work in a bank and a customer had come in for an appointment so I told the guy they were seeing that they had arrived. He then took a phone call and kept them waiting for 15 minutes! I was livid.

I don't usually like to make waves but I've had a problem with this guy ever since I've been there as he's completely unhelpful and if ever I ask him anything he throws his hands up in horror, swears and acts as if he's got the weight of the world on his shoulders. One of those people who thinks they're so put upon when all you expect is for them to do their job!

Anyway I complained and said I was sick of his behaviour. I had planned to do it in a nice way to his face but he pushed me too far so I told the boss! :devil: Dunno if anything will come of it but I certainly felt better.

Good for you Maxine :)

I wish i had of been brave enough to complain about Julie - but luckily i didnt need too (as i found out last week). Apparently the bosses, who i thought were very thick not seeing what was happening, had noticed all along - and they took me and Jess to one side and told us to keep smiling, hang on in there and wait until she bogged off (as she is leaving in 2 weeks).

Im sure i can manage, but its hard something. Just Tuesday evening she annoyed me. I had to rush home as i needed to take Bailey to the vets, and i asked if she wouldnt mind taking the post that evening as it would save time (baring in mind that i take it every night, even though the task is a joint one). She tutting, puffed and said "oh ok, but its not my bloody job".

I couldnt believe it :mellow: It isnt solely my job either, but i do it as its not a big deal and i dont like to cause waves. I mean, as far as i know she is still working for the company so how can she possibly say its not her job ??!!?? We are both on the same level professionally so it felt like she was putting me down and making me sound like the blummin office junior :ranting:

I wish i had of been brave enough to complain about Julie - but luckily i didnt need too (as i found out last week). Apparently the bosses, who i thought were very thick not seeing what was happening, had noticed all along - and they took me and Jess to one side and told us to keep smiling, hang on in there and wait until she bogged off (as she is leaving in 2 weeks).



you see this is where it's all wrong ... they are crap managers cos they should have had it out with her, not just breathed a sigh of relief when she left. This nonsense goes on ALL the time meanwhile the rest of the workforce have to put up with it. And I bet they gave her a great reference for her new job cos they were glad to see the back of her. it does make me angry.

....but I'm glad for your sake that she's gone Bonsai! ... just don't trust those managers!

I complained to my boss once about a member of staff and she stuck up for the other person saying it was because i was younger and the other person didn't like being told what to do by me... Its still going on 2 years later and all of us are sick of her - if you ask her to do something she'll huff with you for a week. She comes in 1/2 hr late every morning and takes extended lunch breaks and still nothing is said.She does nothing at all and we all have to do her work for her. This isn't even the half of it... believe me...

We are all thinking of complaining together but doubt it'll do much good - she is such a cow. She's making our work life a nightmare. Help!! :wallbash:

I complained to my boss once about a member of staff and she stuck up for the other person saying it was because i was younger and the other person didn't like being told what to do by me... Its still going on 2 years later and all of us are sick of her - if you ask her to do something she'll huff with you for a week. She comes in 1/2 hr late every morning and takes extended lunch breaks and still nothing is said.She does nothing at all and we all have to do her work for her. This isn't even the half of it... believe me...

We are all thinking of complaining together but doubt it'll do much good - she is such a cow. She's making our work life a nightmare. Help!! :wallbash:

Ten grand and I'll shot her for you http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_2_49.gif (http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb001_ZNxdm22755GB)

I'm a firm believer in what goes around, comes around, comeuppance and all that. In the meantime it's really annoying that this person seems to be getting away with murder and you KNOW that if it was you, things would be different. But these things have a way of sorting themselves out and you've just got to bide your time.

You will have your just desserts, my love (can I get any more clichees in that post?)

I worked with a woman like that once Donz, the lads on the shop floor used to call her the Ice Queen, she was a reet frosty biatch! There were 4 of us in our office, and she spent nearly a month ignoring me, at one point she reduced me to tears because I just couldnt comprehend being that spiteful to someone for no reason, and believe me, there was NO reason for it!

In the end I had enough and I had it out with her, I dont know what shocked her the most, the fact that I had DARED to confront her, or the fact that I was upset at her behaviour towards me, she said that she didnt know what I was talking about!!

Eventually things "thawed" out and it was all ok, then one day she came in to work after being off sick and broke down in tears to me and said that her husband was having an affair and he had left her, her hubby was her life, I became her "confidante" and we actually ended up really good friends.....eventually!

I have worked in Personnel and it is a difficult job to do, I have also worked for a couple of MAJOR Organisations where you wouldnt DARE report ANYTHING to Personnel for fear of reprisals, which to me defeats the bluddy object to be honest!

I hope things sort themselves out for you Donz, and to be honest, I find your boss's answer to be pretty CACK, AGE is irrelevant, and he/she should do more to stop her behaviour - but then again, your boss is probably a bit scared about dealing with her, the weak pathetic fool - thats usually why they employ a "personnel officer" - to do their dirty work!.....

but like my dear friend :sick: Patsy :wink_kiss says, what goes around comes around!

I'm a firm believer in what goes around, comes around, comeuppance and all that. In the meantime it's really annoying that this person seems to be getting away with murder and you KNOW that if it was you, things would be different. But these things have a way of sorting themselves out and you've just got to bide your time.

You will have your just desserts, my love (can I get any more clichees in that post?)


You could have finished with

And the tide will turn





Well you did ask

At the end of the day, you mark my words

At the end of the day, you mark my words

it will all come out in the wash.......

Thanks Isis,

I think i'll leave confronting her did it before and I ended up being the evil cow and she was the victim, poor thing! She's very good at twisting things. By the way forgot to mention that the boss and her were friends for years and its the only reason she got the job. The best part is that she went for a clerical position and got a senior job! Confused?? yes us too!!

I get on really well with my boss and other work colleagues but I suppose there is always one who has to be office t wat!

Thanksagain for the message and with a bit of luckl she'll get the early retirement she and we all want her to get.

At this moment in time i'd pay twenty!! :wink2:

it will all come out in the wash.......

Que sera sera

We have a girl, Carole, at work at the moment who is obsessed about her weight. She must weigh 8 stone wringing wet but is always saying things like "oh my god, just look at my stomach....." etc etc. Its obvious that the silly cow is fishing for compliments, and of course gets them from the eejits that cant see through her. I cringe when they say, "Oh my god, dont be so silly, you are LOVELY and slim! I wish I had a stomach as flat as that...."

This has been going on for a while, and Ive just tuned out of it now, however the other day, a colleague, Laura who is about a size 20 and perfectly happy with her body (as she should be), wandered in, had a brief word and then stood apart from the others chatting to me. Carole was doing her usual thing - talking about herself and diets etc - and was telling everyone she needed to slim down as she wasnt fitting into her size 10 clothes anymore, and that "she didnt want to start looking the same sort of mess that Laura was........"

THIS was in front of poor Laura who went scarlet, made her excuses and left. As soon as she had gone, I said, "what a terrible thing to say". Carole looked at me like Id gone mad and said, "well its the truth..." Her cronies, to their credit, looked mortified but then they didnt say a word either.

I spoke to my boss about it later that day, as the remark really disturbed me. I saw it as bullying to be honest, and as we have a bullying policy, I decided to report the remark as it was so awful. My Manager's reply was, "oh Im sure it was a one-off remark, if Laura was upset, she will come to me herself....."
Im fuming on Laura's behalf and fuming at the bloody uselessness of my Manager who is paid about four times my salary to "manage" situations like this.
Im praying that Carole will say something derogatory about me and Ill have the excuse to report her again. To be honest, its the closest Ive ever come to giving someone a slap in the mouth. The evil, vain, shallow cow.

Rant over..........

*and exhale......*

wow! what a bitch! what a shallow, selfish, rude bitch! On Laura's behalf I'd like to slap her too - ALOT AND HARD!

Pandora, next time she's fishing for compliments you could say that "yes you actually could do with going on a diet you are looking a bit porky Carole". Bit rotten I know but after what she said I think the vile little witch could probably do with a taste of her own medicine.

I'll join with Dolores and give her a huge slap too.

I'll join with Dolores and give her a huge slap too.

I'm in the queue too. :ranting:

What a nasty, thoughtless cow she sounds. And I can't stand people who kow tow to that sort of behaviour. It certainly does smack of bullying.

We have a girl, Carole, at work at the moment who is obsessed about her weight. She must weigh 8 stone wringing wet but is always saying things like "oh my god, just look at my stomach....." etc etc. Its obvious that the silly cow is fishing for compliments, and of course gets them from the eejits that cant see through her. I cringe when they say, "Oh my god, dont be so silly, you are LOVELY and slim! I wish I had a stomach as flat as that...."



I had a flatmate that was like that Pan, a size 6/8 at most, and was always parading in the mirror saying my bum looks massive and Im so fat, so I just used to agree with her and tell her she was a big fat heiffer :laugh: :laugh:

This one sounds a right biatch though, and I will be praying for you to get revenge on her.....and I want full details of her downfall :devil:

I had a flatmate that was like that Pan, a size 6/8 at most, and was always parading in the mirror saying my bum looks massive and Im so fat, so I just used to agree with her and tell her she was a big fat heiffer :laugh: :laugh:

This one sounds a right biatch though, and I will be praying for you to get revenge on her.....and I want full details of her downfall :devil:

Oh dont worry. As soon as I came out of the managers office and realised she couldnt give a flying fig, I thought, right Carole - you are SO gonna get yours. I really like Laura, she is like a breath of fresh air in our office and now probably feels like she wants the ground to open up. Im going to tell her that I reported Carole, and see what she wants to do about it. I have been told by someone else that Carole is now "wary of me" (and with bloody good reason, she mustve seen the murderous look in my eye), so hopefully she may have learned her lesson and wont open her huge, vain, shallow, charmless trap again. If she does, I may have to stick my boot in it, and go and work in Kwik Save......... :wink2: