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Birth Order of Children! [Archive] - Survivor Online

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Bella
20-05-2005, 03:58 PM
The Birth Order of Children
> >
> >Your Clothes:
> >1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN
> >confirms your pregnancy.
> >2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
> >3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.
> >
> >Preparing for the Birth:
> >1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
> >2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time,
> >breathing didn't do a thing.
> >3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.
> >
> >The Layette:
> >1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and
> >fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
> >2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard
> >only the ones with the darkest stains.
> >3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?
> >
> >Worries:
> >1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick
> >up the baby.
> >2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your
> >firstborn.
> >3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical
> >swing.
> >
> >Pacifier:
> >1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you
> >can go home and wash and boil it.
> >2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with
> >some juice from the baby's bottle.
> >3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
> >
> >Diapering:
> >1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need
> >it or not.
> >2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
> >3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to
> >complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
> >
> >Activities:
> >1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing,and Baby
> >Story Hour.
> >2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
> >3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.
> >
> >Going Out:
> >1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call
> >home five times.
> >2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a
> >number where you can be reached.
> >3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she
> >sees blood.
> >
> >At Home:
> >1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
> >2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older
> >child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
> >3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.
> >
> >Swallowing Coins (a favorite):
> >1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the
> >hospital and demand x-rays.
> >2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for
> >the coin to pass.
> >3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his
> >allowance!!
> >

Andrea
20-05-2005, 08:51 PM
Very funny Bella:laugh:

Critique
21-05-2005, 01:38 PM
Just seen this one - it's soo funny (and probably so true) - had me lol-ing.

Bella
21-05-2005, 04:57 PM
Just seen this one - it's soo funny (and probably so true) - had me lol-ing.

Well, I can relate with the two births........wonder what happens if you have four?! :ninja:

Buzz
21-05-2005, 05:06 PM
If you have four you haven't got time to compare!!

Critique
21-05-2005, 06:31 PM
I think if you have 4, number 1 brings it up best way he/she can ;)

Cat
22-05-2005, 09:33 AM
Very good Bella, its very true...especially the dummy thing. I used to do exactly that with the first...in fact a used to go out with about 10 strerized in a sterized pot. My sisters used to roar and really take the pee out of me.

Freddie (3rd), is in the habit of licking the floor (his impression of a cat)....I make sure I sweep it now and again.

Patsy
22-05-2005, 10:39 AM
I think if you have 4, number 1 brings it up best way he/she can ;)


:w00t: ........

Gelastic
27-05-2005, 01:40 PM
I have just managed to stop sterilising stuff for Samuel, but clothes wise, he is the worst dressed baby in Wick. I gave up putting socks on him about two months ago and he hasn't worn them since :D

Critique
27-05-2005, 02:33 PM
I have just managed to stop sterilising stuff for Samuel, but clothes wise, he is the worst dressed baby in Wick. I gave up putting socks on him about two months ago and he hasn't worn them since :D

I just know that's not true about being the worst dressed but even if it were, who would notice with his gorgeous eyes and cheeky grin.

bridge
19-06-2005, 06:45 PM
That is so funny !!!!!!! and the funniest thing is it's all true! :)