If you were to be less abled than you are now, in any way, what part of your physical abilities that you have now would you most fear losing?

I would just not cope with being helped to go to the loo, not one bit it.The thought fills me with horror, yet I have helped many less able to the loo in a cheerful proffesional way. I could cope with loss of independent mobility, sight and hearing but having to be helped to the loo just makes my insides sink.

I saw a programme once about a man who had been in a coma for 15 years. He was mentally and physicaly healthy for the majority of that time, but he was in a comatose state. Throughout that time, everyone assumed he was living in a dream world - unconscious, but alive. Basically, a long, deep sleep.

When he came out of that coma, he was able to explain that the experience was very, very different from that of a peacful sleep. He had been aware of of every sound, every touch, every communication, every smell for most of the 15 years. He had simply been unable to respond. He was not so much in a coma as in a state of total paralysis an no-one aroudn him was aware of that.

Inside, he was screaming in frustration for nearly 15 years. He described it was being buried alive without the release of death. It was by no means certain that he would ever have come of that state either.

I think I'd find that pretty hard to cope with!

Karen that is my worst nightmare. I suffer from sleep paralysis, it only lasts a few minutes but that is long enough, to be in that state for 15 years is a horrendous thought.

Karen that is my worst nightmare. I suffer from sleep paralysis, it only lasts a few minutes but that is long enough, to be in that state for 15 years is a horrendous thought.

Gosh Bob - I used to suffer from that too! Its really terrifying!

I haven't had an episode for about 5 years now, but it used to happen to me on a semi regular basis - waking up n the middle of the night completely and utterly paralysed. And no attack was ever less terrifying than the one before.

I've read up about it a bit, and apparently its a syndrome which affects some people up to around the age of 30. It usually stops happening around that age, give or take a year or two. I dunno what age you are Bob, but its quite reasurring toknow that it won't last forever.

Really awful aren't they Karen? I get all the hallucinations too. I've had them since I was a child, less frequently now though, one every couple of months, more if I'm stressed or sleep deprived. I've past the 30 mark! So I hope they stop soon. When I am having regular episodes it make me frightened to go to sleep which of course makes it worse, I have learnt to force myself out of the paralysis, it’s difficult but if I concentrate really hard I can do it.

I bet there are loads of people on here who suffer too, but do you know only 10 years ago when the episodes were so bad it was seriously getting me down my GP had never heard of it! Nowadays you hear of it all the time of TV.

Count me as one of these people Bob. I don't get it as often now, but I used to be completely paralysed and I couldn't even shout. I was desperate to scream but nothing would come out. At first I used to think I was having an outer body experience, my mates used to take the complete p*ss out of me when I told them about it!

I used to have them I thought they were natural. I have not had one for about eight years so tag a ten on that 30. I also tend to stay in the bed more now than I did and wake up with covers still on etc, its only been the last few years I can use a duvet! The feeling between sleep and waking is dreadful and that tou remeber it the next morning is worse, I had my first in childhhod and I would describe it as I was stuck in and egg....my MUm said they were normal for some I think she had them.
Remaining conscious and carrying on with daily life being assisted in the loo still remains my biggest fear.

I get it too. I also get the hallucinations, but I'm so used to it now I don't even think twice about it. I find the worse ones are when you are dropping off to sleep though. And I'm 37, so not sure about the age 30 thing. I've been having a lot of them lately and have been waking up in pure terror, and it's horrible. I guess I must be worried about a few things at the moment.

I don't think I could cope with not being able to cope with everyday life if that makes any sense. :)

I have found that when it actually comes to it, most people can, and do, cope with pretty much anything.

It's more a case of having to. You're right V, when faced with situations that people think they cannot cope with, they find that inner strength and do cope quite well with it. I think it's probably due to the anticipatory anxiety. It's like going to a dentist and dreading it, then finding out once it's all over, that it really wasn't that bad.

The thing is I don't think we do, many attempt to commit suicide when long term quality of life is threatened as in early adult type schizophrenia. We may with changed indepenence put up and shut up and be cheerful but do we cope inside with the altered person the adaptions make us. A compromised lifestyle that effects our day to day living and changes our sense of self is visibly more managable in todays society, and we are expected to continue as normal if possible. Coping doesn't mean liking.

Coping doesn't mean liking.No, I quite agree, but then people have very different coping mechanisms, so 'coping' is hard to define. To be honest I don't think it's possible to know what you can or cannot cope with until you are faced with the need to do so. People are very resilliant and I'm constantly amazed by what the human spirit can endure.

What wouldn't you like to cope with, I sat with a few people drinking coffee well mines water and our reasons for what we would not like to have to cope with were self deprecating and humerous as one of the party has bifida it was real.
We all cope but what would be really rotton, I would not give a jot about going shopping, I can look at art on screen but .......

I already have a degenerative eye condition which, I have been told, will probably result in me becoming blind well before old age.

I have just accepted the idea as there's nothing I can do to change it - all I can do is adapt. It won't be glorious at all but you just have to make the best you can out of the situation.

My biggest fear would be being paralysed - I am such an "active" person, always running around doing things, that being reduced to the role of bystander fills me with horror.

Re: being helped to go to the toilet - this happened to me once when I'd had an operation. Simon had to take me there and help me with things, and so did the nurses when I was still in hospital. I honestly thought I would never cope with something like this, but when it happened I just accepted it - I didn't have a choice. The way I rationalised it was, it was just as unpleasant for them as it was for me, so I just had to make light of it, get on with it, and not make the experience any more unpleasant than it already was.