This is a thread for anyone who was planning a night in with a packet of Doritos and actually ended up meeting an attractive stranger on the way home followed by a night of frenzied scr*wing under a hedge to tell us about it.

Ill let you know in the morning, who knows - my luck might be in tonight :w00t:

Wow SF you didn't waste any time...now the chances of this being me tonight...ermmmmmm :sad:

i eat the cheaper Co-op version SF ... does this mean my "shag" story will also be cheap and not to your expensive tastes?

the other week I had the Morrison's version. and I have to say the "shag" that night ... well I don't think it was human!

and I have to say the "shag" that night ... well I don't think it was human!

Did it have batteries Dol.... :bag:

I'm off now...SUT!

Must it be under a hedge?

I had some frantic screwing last night when I accidentally pulled off the door of the kitchen cupboard as I reached up for a fresh pack of Doritos. (Cool Original Flavour)

This is a thread for anyone who was planning a night in with a packet of Doritos and actually ended up meeting an attractive stranger on the way home followed by a night of frenzied scr*wing under a hedge to tell us about it.

I have never, never I tell you screwed under a hedge!! I always do it in safety, with goggles and gloves in the garage - so throw water on your distasteful thoughts and get on those knees now!!:glare:

get on those knees now!!:glare:


OOohhh errrrr missus :laugh:

get on those knees now!!:glare:

you sure you're not a dominatrix in your spare time Flip :blink:

get on those knees now!!:glare:

Flip, you cruel, cruel woman.
You just know Sf's in his laderhosen and will scratch his knees to hell on all that bramble under the hedge.

You just know Sf's in his laderhosen and will scratch his knees to hell on all that bramble under the hedge.

Oh he loves it Andrea, don't give his knees another thought!! :laugh:

I wondered if you always use a roundhead SF - any tips re technique?

get on those knees now!!:glare:

OK - after you Flip.

Thinks ... this is more like it!

I wondered if you always use a roundhead SF - any tips re technique?

It says in my book you should start off slowly to avoid slipping, then you can speed up once it's firmly in. Don't forget to stop once it's all the way in! If you're working at an awkward angle, ask a friend or family member to hold you up until you've finished. And remember - always clean up afterwards, that's part of the job.

I think the best screwing I have had recently was with Mr Cat on the decking.

It was a hot sunny afternoon and the sweat was dripping off us with the exertion. I squatted on the decking on all fours with my power tool, hammering it in with all my might, then Mr Cat came up my behind, inserting his almighty tool in my hole with a shudder, making sure he screwed it in good an tight.

It went on all afternoon.

Afterwards, sore and exhausted, we replenished with a few cold beers and congratulated each other for a job well done, the neighbours were impressed too.

I think the best screwing I have had recently was with Mr Cat on the decking.

It was a hot sunny afternoon and the sweat was dripping off us with the exertion. I squatted on the decking on all fours with my power tool, hammering it in with all my might, then Mr Cat came up my behind, inserting his almighty tool in my hole with a shudder, making sure he screwed it in good an tight.

It went on all afternoon.

Afterwards, sore and exhausted, we replenished with a few cold beers and congratulated each other for a job well done, the neighbours were impressed too.
I bet they were ! Id have been impressed enough to give you a round of applause and then sent the video to You've Been Framed.... :pimp:

I think the best screwing I have had recently was with Mr Cat on the decking.

It was a hot sunny afternoon and the sweat was dripping off us with the exertion. I squatted on the decking on all fours with my power tool, hammering it in with all my might, then Mr Cat came up my behind, inserting his almighty tool in my hole with a shudder, making sure he screwed it in good an tight.

It went on all afternoon.

Afterwards, sore and exhausted, we replenished with a few cold beers and congratulated each other for a job well done, the neighbours were impressed too.

I'd have given you some 'rep' for that but I'm too busy re-adjusting my trousers.

I'd have given you some 'rep' for that but I'm too busy re-adjusting my trousers.:photo: Gotcha....

Lots of screwing going on the Coastie house today.....I had to move my computer table from the loft room to my bedroom! :wink2:

Lots of screwing going on the Coastie house today.....I had to move my computer table from the loft room to my bedroom! :wink2:

Are your hands sore with all the friction Coastie?

Are your hands sore with all the friction Coastie?

:shocking: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

I do hope everyone is using protection - i found knee protectors invaluable when doing some serious screwing in the attic.

I do hope everyone is using protection.

No I never use knee pads - but I find goggles invaluble, especially with power tools, you never know what is going to fly up and land in your eyes!

What I'd like to know from Voice of Reason is do you screw the other way round in the southern hemisphere?

If the laundry rooms are anything to go by they screw upside down on the ceiling!

I had a very unsatisfying screw this afternoon. Since we redecorated bits have fallen out of my hole and made it much bigger than it was before - gaping infact.

I manufactured some plugging out of plastic shoving it up as far as it would go so that some grip could be achieved.

There was a lot of huffing and puffing, putting it in and pulling it out, in out in out until finally a good strong hold could be maintained.

Let's hope its tight enough now!

What I'd like to know from Voice of Reason is do you screw the other way round in the southern hemisphere?

No SF, I've found that the screwing is pretty much the same, except it's eleven hours ahead in time.