The prods of CBB have approached you with an invitation to spend three weeks in "the House". They have also asked you to select nine housemates. You may invite any celeb you wish but at least two have to be American and one must be Ukrainian - in fact, ignore the Ukrainian, that's just silly.

So it's you, two American celebs, and seven other celebs, from which at least one must be Black (five male + four female or four male + five female - obviously dependent on your own sex)

Also, you are forced to eat the same four meals (breakfast/lunch/dinner/supper) for each full week, but you must alter the dishes at the close of each week. You may have what you like and eat as much as you like (eg, three boiled eggs with two bread slices worth of "soldiers" with a Marmite topping...) but it is absolutely imperative that you alter....failure to do this wil result in your being forced to undergo a nasty task.

Beverages may remain the same throughout.

You are permitted three luxury items and you also have the option of cigarettes, cigars, pipe, or candy cigarettes (the ones that always include a card with a pic of a dinosaur and various facts on the reverse).

There is a newly-installed dvd player for all housemates use so you may also choose twenty of your favourite movies (one of which must star Chevy Chase) to bring into the house with you.

Lastly, you have an option of one board game from Monopoly, Scrabble, or Cluedo. Alternatively, you may choose the deluxe Poker kit complete with playing surface and an abundant quantity of ceramic chips.

Housemate One ~
Housemate Two ~
Housemate Three ~
Housemate Four ~
Housemate Five ~
Housemate Six ~
Housmeate Seven ~
Housemate Eight ~
Housemate Nine ~
**************
Week One Breakfast ~
Week One Lunch ~
Week One Dinner ~
Week One Supper ~
**************
Week Two Breakfast ~
Week Two Lunch ~
Week Two Dinner ~
Week Two Supper ~
**************
Week Three Breakfast ~
Week Three Lunch ~
Week Three Dinner ~
Week Three Supper ~
**************
Beverages (select four to remain throughout)
**************
Cigarettes/Cigars/Pipe/Candy cigarettes (select one) ~
**************
Movie One ~
Movie Two ~
Movie Three ~
Movie Four ~
Movie Five ~
Movie Six ~
Movie Seven ~
Movie Eight ~
Movie Nine ~
Movie Ten ~
Movie Eleven ~
Movie Twelve ~
Movie Thirteen ~
Movie Fourteen ~
Movie Fifteen ~
Movie Sixteen ~
Movie Seventeen ~
Movie Eighteen ~
Movie Nineteen ~
Movie Twenty ~
************
Monopoly/Scrabble/Cluedo/Poker (select one) ~

Housemate One ~ Lenny Henry (likeable if not that funny)
Housemate Two ~ John McEnroe (stereotypically confrontational - it was only the one outburst!)
Housemate Three ~ Gene Wilder (funny)
Housemate Four ~ Larry David (funny)
Housemate Five ~ Dawn French (cuddly and funny)
Housemate Six ~ Elizabeth Saary (BBC weathergirl - bootiful...real bootiful!)
Housemate Seven ~ Mishal Hussein (BBC early morning bulletin - phwooaar!!)
Housemate Eight ~ Polly Hudson (gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous)
Housemate Nine ~ Nena Hossain (ITV lunchtime news - sexy as hell!))
**************
Week One Breakfast ~ succulent rainbow trout (three of 'em) and 3 boiled eggs (with Marmite-topped soldiers (twelve)
Week One Lunch ~ a plateful of crisp golden chips with a fair sprinkling of salt and a little vinegar together with ketchup on the side
Week One Dinner ~ roast chicken and roast potatoes
Week One Supper ~ two large slices of Black Forest gateau, one Creme egg (maybe two), and a fair-sized slab of Cheddar cheese
**************
Week Two Breakfast ~ smoked salmon (two'll be fine) and a full tub of cottage cheese
Week Two Lunch ~ a Cadbury's Boost and a Twix, along with four bacon & egg muffins
Week Two Dinner ~ a generous helping of peeled prawns and eight crackers (well buttered) with cheddar cheese topping
Week Two Supper ~ two microwaveable chocolate puddings with chocolate sauce and a Penguin (original type)
**************
Week Three Breakfast ~ (I'll skip brekkie for the final week and have a lie-in instead, hopefully in the same bed as Polly ):wub:
Week Three Lunch ~ three veggie-burger muffins (each with a small dollop of ketchup)
Week Three Dinner ~ a whole meat-topping pizza
Week Three Supper ~ coffee-flavoured ice-cream, and if i can manage it, a Wall's Mint-choc Cornetto
**************
Beverages (select four to remain throughout) ~ Hot-chocolate, Capuccino, Coca-Cola, and Woodpecker (what else?) Cider
**************
Cigarettes/Cigars/Pipe/Candy cigarettes (select one) ~ Cigars (I want to look like a smug bas*ard too!)
**************
Movie One ~ National Lampoon's Vacation
Movie Two ~ National Lampoon's Vegas Vacation
Movie Three ~ National Lampoon's European Vacation
Movie Four ~ Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Movie Five ~ The Lost Boys
Movie Six ~ Withnail & I
Movie Seven ~ Monty Pythons' The Life of Brian
Movie Eight ~ Monty Pythons' The Meaning of Life
Movie Nine ~ Jaws
Movie Ten ~ Planes,Trains, & Automobiles
Movie Eleven ~ Dazed & Confused
Movie Twelve ~ That 70's Show - Series One (24 episodes)
Movie Thirteen ~ The Gumball Rally 3000
Movie Fourteen ~ Pulp Fiction
Movie Fifteen ~ Dumb & Dumber
Movie Sixteen ~ Zabriskie Point
Movie Seventeen ~ The Odd Couple
Movie Eighteen ~ The Producers
Movie Nineteen ~ Woodstock - Three Days of Peace and Music
Movie Twenty ~ Beavis & Butthead Do America
************
Monopoly/Scrabble/Cluedo/Poker (select one) ~ Poker (I'll have a bash at learning it)

of course, when you make a list as extensive as this, you often tend to omit some contents you had initially intended to include....such as Three Luxury Items - and i'm not willing to forego this option so here they are....

Luxury Item One ~ acoustic guitar (i promise i'll use it more frequently then what Preston did...)
Luxury Item Two ~ i never go on any reality show without my Atari (Pacman, Pong, and Tanks cartridges included)
Luxury Item Three ~ Ricky Gervais (had to sneak him in somehow...)

much as I admire your prolific posts above Woodstock ... I find that thinking too deeply about them has given me a headache!

much as I admire your prolific posts above Woodstock ... I find that thinking too deeply about them has given me a headache!

yeah, the thought process gave me a migraine sent from hell too! :wallbash:

It was one of those "oh dear, now it's all over whatever shall i do with myself" moments...:(