Share you holiday loo experiences here!

The worst loo...
The best loo...
The loo an unusual event occured in...
The loo you spent an unhealthy amount of time in...

Anyone who has travelled beyond their front door has come across a loo that requires a public health warning at least once in their life...

I've been in several...some were just blocked and minging others were just so rundown or bug infested I feared for my life! From proper loos all scummed up to holes in the ground that required a perfect aim or I ended up with splashed ankles :sick:

Ever had to squat behind a bush while out on an adventure and stung your bum on a nettle :blush: or have you been in an incredibly surreal toilet high on a mountain which required you to put your bottom out over the edge of a sheer drop? :shocking:

The worst loo...
Definately in Turkey. It was literally a hole in the ground.

The best loo...
I went into one in a casino in Vegas and it was better than our whole room in our hotel.

The loo an unusual event occured in...
I'd rather not say...

The loo you spent an unhealthy amount of time in...
See above.

I hated the toilets in Turkey. Not just because you can't flush paper down them but because there was usually an open bin oveflowing with paper in each one. Some were quite disgusting.

Tip for toiletting in Turkey is to take nappy sacks if you'd rather not leave your loo paper exposed after use. Also they're scented. This applies to your hotel room really, not the public loos.

I think my worse loo was a campsite in France. Hole in the ground and the smell made me heave every time I had to venture in. Tried to hold on as long as poss but ended up making myself ill.
The best was prob in New York where they had a range of Molton Brown products as your disposal. I spent quite some time in there.

My worst has to be the race track at Le Mans I was heaving just standing in the queue. I then tried the campsite ones slightly better but still vile. The woods nearby even with rats openly running around were infinitely more inviting.

I also forgot about the chemical port-a-loos at 'T in the park' - they're filled with sh*t of all consistencies, pee, vomit, blood-soaked tampons, you name it. Absolutely vile.

I am very particular about loos. My nose is also extra sensistive.

I can't use the loo on those long distance travel coaches, the smell is horrendous not from the fact that some can use them. But the cleaning substance that breaks down all deposits. Having gone in one or two I have simply had to come out otherwise, I'd throw up.

I don't like those new modern gadget loos either that some parts of Europe have gone in for. You can get stuck for more than a few minutes whilst deciphering the foreign language instructions. Very claustrobobic.

I only use a loo if it is clean. Once or twice I have been desperate for a wee, and have tentatively hovered over bushes or a verge at the side of a motorway parking bit. With both passenger doors open you can achieve a little decorum even here. Although having a wee on a public motorway has given rise to the amusement and a threat from the driver that he is going to get the camera out, for a night time mooning pic.

The cleanest countries for hotel lavatories is Austria followed by Germany and Britain.

Turkey is a serious health hazard.

Maureen
Northern angel.

Japanese Loos!

Whats the story there? The traditional Japanese loo is a hole in the ground, although they don't tend to get clogged and sticky like the Turkish ones. Then they seem to have skipped the entire "normal" toilet seat phase and have gone for space-shuttle loos that do everything but wipe your bum. Features include:

- as soon as you sit on it, an extractor kicks off in the bowl so that any olefactory discretion goes down not up
- seat is electrically warmed and soft so its always warm
- a captain Kirk control pannel with all sorts of buttons. I started to play with them but was quite intimidated and didn't get through the full range after the first one shot a jet of water up my bum

I'm feeling braver though so will just avoid the drench button next time. I'm worried one connects to the internet or calls the fire brigade - update soon.

Gat...love the bit about the button for the fire service...oh what if! :laugh:

I hate those musical loos that they introduced over here a few years back...I am always worried that I'll wriggle on the seat and the sensor will think I'm done and the door will open to reveal me seated on the throne singing along to whatever tune is playing! :blush:

Worst loos - France, hole in the ground with spiders waiting to drop on your head - YUK! In fact any camping loos cos they're always full of spiders and stink. Although, when we camp in bruv-in-law's woods in Billericay the loo consists of a shovel and a walk in the woods :wacko:

Most embarrassing loo story - peeing in Monaco main road between two parked cars because I was desperate.

Best loos: London Hilton and the Savoy, with carpet, flowers, music, chairs in front of the mirrors, perfume etc. The attendant looked like she hated you for daring to use them though. (No I wasn't staying there - they were the venue for ex husband's firm's annual dinner/dance)

Most annoying loos: Victoria Station where you have to haul your luggage through a turnstile and then down a steep flight of stairs.

There is a loo at Cairo airport apparently that has a clean toilet...reason being the poo and urine is splattered around the floor, walls and ceiling...yes ceiling! My freind discovered it during her travels...:shocking:

On outward bound I had to dig a hole and do my business (Brat Camp stylee) and had no problems with that...

in the States we had out houses which were literally a hole in the ground with a loo seat on the top. They were sheltered by a shed type construction (yes Patsy shed!) and because they were down in the woods it was always a case of checking down the hole before you exposed your bottom to it for fear of snakes or black widow spiders...at night all the flying bugs would buzz you as you peed! It was an adventure all the same and a fond, if slightly bizzare, memory!