Do you do it in real life?

I do. I did!

recently I was quite forceful after some snotty cow pinched my parking space which I was lining up to reverse in to (she knew I was too!). Anyway I got out of my car and marched over asking her quite politely if she hadn't realised I was going to reverse into the spot. She foolishly denid it! I pursed my lips and letting out a whoosh of disbelieving air and told her she knew fool well I was going to park there and that she was wrong to have nipped in and very rude, VERY RUDE I shouted as I walked away ... I didn't expect the snotty cow to move but I wasn't going to let her think she'd got away with something ... she took her some time before she got out of her car to go and get her parking ticket, I can tell you!

but boy did it feel good to let her know that she was wrong ... she was wasn't she?!

Also i recently spoke to one of women I work with who NEVER makes a cup of tea but ALWAYS accepts when she's offered one ... I told her, I did, I told her that she NEVER makes a cup of tea but ALWAYS accepts when she's offered one ... and do you know what ... she hasn't drank or made a cup of tea since!!!

Dol that poor woman could die of dehydration now and it'll all be your fault!

I wish I could be more assertive :bag: .

Is it safe to come out yet?




I'm scared

Dol that poor woman could die of dehydration now and it'll all be your fault!

I wish I could be more assertive :bag: .

that's the word I was looking for, for the title! d'oh ... :kid:

Good for you Dol

Is she now a dehydrated shrivelled heap in the corner? :D

Is it safe to come out yet?




I'm scared

I knew i recognised those stilletoes and shapely calves!

Good for you Dolores, I find it really hard to do that sort of thing, but on the occasions I do I always feel really good afterwards... bet the silly mare will be feeling bad about it all day now while you get to feel all good and powerful. That'll learn her :D

I used to find it hard, no really I did, but then I found that by not speaking up I made myself sick by getting all angst-ridden over something petty. So one day I just said sorry, no, to someone and it all just snowballed.

You just need to empower yourself once or twice to realise that you don't die and you get smacked in the mouth for stating your case in a reasoned manner.

I'm not that great at standing my ground and speaking up, but I am getting better especially since I had the kids.

Like Floops I used to get myself all worked up and ill over things, and then once I had spoken up the first time, I felt much better.

Absolutely Buzz, children make you much more assertive. I'd never take anything back if it was for me, but if there was something wrong with something I'd bought for either of the kids I'd be marching it back like a shot :pimp:

Just you wait til they get to school! that's when it really kicked in for me...

Absolutely Buzz, children make you much more assertive. I'd never take anything back if it was for me, but if there was something wrong with something I'd bought for either of the kids I'd be marching it back like a shot :pimp:

really I find it hard to beleive that you would never take something back if it was wrong/faulty for yourself only your kids ...

I've always been a great one for knowing my rights and taking stuff back - something I am proud to say I've passed on to my son (sometimes!). Once he took a crappy #1 toy back to the tacky shop at Butlins cos it broke at the end of the week's stay - I think he was only about 9 - anyway he got his money back! makes you weep, don't it! :kid:

I stand up for myself and others if I feel there is an injustice being done but have to say it has landed me in a small spot of bother at work from time to time over the years...even though I have been right on every occasion! :surrender:

LOL Dol know exactly what you mean.

I was on holiday once in Madeira and a bus load of us were all lined up and waiting at the desk at the hotel to be seen too, i had two very tired kids and this old guy just walked up and stood in front of me in the line, so i asked the lady in front of him if he was with her, she said no and boy did i see red, i caused a big scene in front of everybody and embarresssed the ole codge, but what cheek, i felt great afterwards for giving him a piece of my mind.

There's a difference between being assertive and being aggressive though.

Do you do it in real life?

I do. I did!

recently I was quite forceful after some snotty cow pinched my parking space which I was lining up to reverse in to (she knew I was too!). Anyway I got out of my car and marched over asking her quite politely if she hadn't realised I was going to reverse into the spot. She foolishly denid it! I pursed my lips and letting out a whoosh of disbelieving air and told her she knew fool well I was going to park there and that she was wrong to have nipped in and very rude, VERY RUDE I shouted as I walked away ... I didn't expect the snotty cow to move but I wasn't going to let her think she'd got away with something ... she took her some time before she got out of her car to go and get her parking ticket, I can tell you!

but boy did it feel good to let her know that she was wrong ... she was wasn't she?!



This happened to me once, again I was lining up to park and this guy nipped and took my space. I got out and he just said it was f*** tough! Boy, I swear I so wanted to let his tyres down, instead I spent the next 15 minutes driving around trying to find a space!

I agree that if you deal with it in the right way instead of going around all guns blazing then you get a lot more respect. I am sure Dol did make the woman feel awful as she dealt with it politely - there was a sad case in Glasgow not that long ago where 2 women were fighting over a parking space and sadly one woman died. Sometimes you just have to let it go, I am not saying to be a pushover but there are some things that are more important.

I do remember once when I bought a pair of shoes, tried them on and they fitted perfectly but when I got them home I realised I had been given 2 left shoes! I took them back and they couldn't find the right one so I was told that they could only give me a credit note. I stated that as I couldn't wear the shoes and the fault was theirs for giving me 2 left shoes that I was entitled to my money back. The manager was called and she gave the spiel that it was company policy not to refund, blah, blah but I stood my ground and I got my money back. Can't remember how much the shoes were but it was something 99p and they gave me 99p back in 5p, 10p and 9p's - I offered to give them a penny but they said they couldn't take it as the till wouldn't balance properly!! Scary but true!:ninja:

I do remember once when I bought a pair of shoes, tried them on and they fitted perfectly but when I got them home I realised I had been given 2 left shoes!


What's odd about that your Scottish aren't you ? As the Welsh have webbed feet you Scots have two left feet don't you..? That's why your not very good at Rugby or Football isn't it?


Can't remember how much the shoes were but it was something 99p and they gave me 99p back in 5p, 10p and 9p's - I offered to give them a penny but they said they couldn't take it as the till wouldn't balance properly!! Scary but true!:ninja:

See it's that funny Scotch money again! no wonder the tills won't add up.

I dont stand up for myself, and i should. I simmer gently, but never explode.

Just recently someone who i thought was a friend said something about me which i didnt appreciate. I heard about this 2nd hand. Now, what i should do is talk to him and tell him he upset me, and i dont appreciate him gossiping about me .... but will i ???? Nah.

I'm sure Groucho didn't mean it. :bag:

I heard about this 2nd hand.

Can you be sure it's true then? :unsure:

IJust recently someone who i thought was a friend said something about me which i didnt appreciate. I heard about this 2nd hand. Now, what i should do is talk to him and tell him he upset me, and i dont appreciate him gossiping about me .... but will i ???? Nah.

But you should Bonsai, this second hand information may have been exaggerated or may not even be true! I would fester about this until I knew the truth - better out than in!!!

Yep I am confrontational and proud!

Can you be sure it's true then? :unsure:

I cant 100% - but a couple of people have mentioned that this same man has said the same thing. Because of this, im guessing its true.

I cant 100% - but a couple of people have mentioned that this same man has said the same thing. Because of this, im guessing its true.

You know how quickly pub talk gets round after a few drinks.

Oh, the intrigue!!!

Was it an internerd or a real life person?

I remember a few years ago one of my work friends was being really funny with me. I asked her what was wrong and she said that this jerk that worked in the office with us had said to her that I had said she was disruptive and annoying. I had not said any such thing and I tackled the trouble making fool - he laughed nervously and said it was a "joke". A friendship COULD have been ruined unnecessarily. Dont take as gospel hearsay.

I cant 100% - but a couple of people have mentioned that this same man has said the same thing. Because of this, im guessing its true.

Go on then Bonnie what did he say about you? Fill us in on the gory details, let us decide if this no-mark if worthy of a public lynching!! :devil:

My mother in law makes up stories all the time - she tells my sister in law & brother in law that I don't allow her to see her grandchildren when the truth is that she phones up one day and asks to see then the next as she is coming into Edinburgh, more often than not I usually have something arranged to which she gets annoyed about! Sorry, but I don't sit around all day waiting for her phonecall, so I then say what about arranging something for the following week or the week after and she says she'll get back to me but she won't finalise a date so the same thing happens over & over again. I haven't bothered to mention this to her because it is just not worth the hassle - my brother & sister in law knows how twisted she can be and it's is a case of when she bad mouths anyone you just take it with a pinch of salt.

You will all be disappointed when i tell you. Its a man who is in his 60s, and he told a few people that we neglect our animals.

It hurt, as our animals are our life. They get the best of everything, and WE go without so they dont have to.

It hurt because it couldnt be further than the truth.

You will all be disappointed when i tell you. Its a man who is in his 60s, and he told a few people that we neglect our animals.

It hurt, as our animals are our life. They get the best of everything, and WE go without so they dont have to.

It hurt because it couldnt be further than the truth.


Hang on....isn't one of them now without and dressed in a humiliating plastic ruff??


Me thinks the lady doth protest too much

Hang on....isn't one of them now without and dressed in a humiliating plastic ruff??


Me thinks the lady doth protest too much
OH GOD. You are right :huh: I am indeed a bad mother :(

Now you see I would have this out with him Bons. In the ncest possible way ask him how and why he thinks your animals are neglected...get to thebottom of it, don't let it wind you up.

Now you see I would have this out with him Bons. In the ncest possible way ask him how and why he thinks your animals are neglected...get to thebottom of it, don't let it wind you up.

Or you could threaten to chop his balls off :wacko:

Now you see I would have this out with him Bons. In the ncest possible way ask him how and why he thinks your animals are neglected...get to thebottom of it, don't let it wind you up.

Ah, but what if he didn't say it and it's all just hearsay or simple case of misunderstaning but I would keep Baillie in the house at the moment, don't want to give them any more to gossip about do you!? :kid:

I agree with Buzz (and despair of Slipper). If he denies it, you can maintain your acquaintance in a civilised manner, but at least he will know you're onto him. If it is chinese whispers, you can hopefully nip it in the bud.

I think I will just mention this 'rumour' on Thursday. See what he says.

Although he has upset me, i dont want to upset him at he is an older man and he enjoys his one night out a week. He sits with me and a few others and i would hate to make him feel uncomfortable.

I know the truth, as do the people he has gossiped too - hence why they told us in utter disbelief. The people he spoke to have seen our animals loads and have seen the love showered on them. He has never seen the animals, and he has never been to my house. Bygones.

I think I will just mention this 'rumour' on Thursday. See what he says.

Although he has upset me, i dont want to upset him at he is an older man and he enjoys his one night out a week. He sits with me and a few others and i would hate to make him feel uncomfortable.

I know the truth, as do the people he has gossiped too - hence why they told us in utter disbelief. The people he spoke to have seen our animals loads and have seen the love showered on them. He has never seen the animals, and he has never been to my house. Bygones.

SF's gonna have a go at you for asking everyone's advice and then ignoring it .... are you ok with that?!

SF's gonna have a go at you for asking everyone's advice and then ignoring it .... are you ok with that?!

I dont think i actually asked for advice - everyone just gave it, which is nice. Thats why i like this place. I also like biscuits, magazines, coffee .... and im sure there was something else that made me like this place, but ive forgotten :huh:

Me? :bag:


,

Me? :bag:


,

Hmmmm, nah i dont think it was you :wink_kiss

Hmmmm, nah i dont think it was you :wink_kiss

ok that's one down - 2190 members to go ...

Dolores takes a deep breath ...

OK then, ME! :yahoo:

ok that's one down - 2190 members to go ...

Dolores takes a deep breath ...

OK then, ME! :yahoo:

Me?


God you two, leave the girl alone, you are so full of yourselves....



t'was me wasn't it Bons..

Come on, you all know that the ONE person who keeps me coming back for more is .................. SF :w00t:

Come on, you all know that the ONE person who keeps me coming back for more is .................. SF :w00t:

Yes, he is definitely the reason I keep coming back........his wit, his charm, his knobbly knees and his hairy ar8e, what more could you want from an on-line forum member?

So, anyway Bonnie when are you going to have it out with this old fella? :boxing:

after too many years as a trodden on doormat, I find I'm aggressively assertive when the need arises...I'd rather let someone know that I'm a force to be reckoned with than a wishy-washy hand wringer. My son's 2nd grade teacher caught the bulk of this last year, hubby has been getting his fair share, and a new girl at work is fixin' to get her load...oldest son has apparently taken a vaccine against it:unsure:

oldest son has apparently taken a vaccine against it:unsure:

Is that the "Yeah, Whatever" vaccine?

that one and the "I know you're talking but I'm ignoring you b/c you are old and stupid" one.:glare: